Dear John

Taylor Swift

Long were the nights when my days once revolved around you

Counting my footsteps praying the floor won't fall through again

And my mother accused me of losing my mind

But I swore I was fine

You paint me a blue sky and go back and turn it to rain

And I lived in your chess game, but you changed the rules everyday

Wondering which version of you I might get on the phone tonight

Well, I stopped picking up and this song is to let you know why

Dear John, I see it all now that you're gone

Don't you think I was too young to be messed with?

The girl in the dress cried the whole way home

I should've known

Well, maybe it's me and my blind optimism to blame

Or maybe it's you and your sick need to give love then take it away

And you'll add my name to your long list of traitors who don't understand

And I'll look back and regret how I ignored when they said run as fast as you can

Dear John, I see it all now that you're gone

Don't you think I was too young to be messed with?

The girl in the dress cried the whole way home

Dear John, I see it all now it was wrong

Don't you think nineteen's too young to be played by

Your dark twisted games when I loved you so

I should've known

You are an expert at sorry and keeping lines blurry

Never impressed by me acing your tests

All the girls that you've run dry have tired, lifeless eyes

'Cause you've burn them out

But I took your matches before fire could catch me

So don't look now

I'm shining like fireworks over

Your sad, empty town

Dear John, I see it all now that you're gone

Don't you think I was too young to be messed with?

The girl in the dress cried the whole way home

I see it all now that you're gone

Don't you think i was too young to be messed with?

The girl in the dress wrote you a song

You should've known

You should've known

Don't you think I was too young?

You should've known

______________________________

Oh Lord Almighty.. Please help us.

____________________

HAPPY 12th BIRTHDAY..

MIKE!

________________________________

One More Time

You won't believe what I'm currently doing right now.. I'm wasting my life. Doing. Nothing.

Though I could still burn 2,000 calories just by existing today, there are a lot of fats to burn. Dude, it's a long way to go.

Just like what I'm doing with my life. It is gonna be a long way to go. Many rice to eat. Many tears to cry. Many laugh to burst.. And maybe, just maybe, many dreams to come true.

Unfortunately, how much I would love to be the hero of my life.. Life, for some reason, hasn't changed that much. This life of mine has a lot of surprises than I thought it would.

I got this spinning head again. No, that's not what I mean. What I mean is that I got another illness to overcome. It was 2 days ago, when I thought it was just another wrong way of getting up from sleep. I was so dizzy and it led to nausea to the yukky vomiting and dude, even words can't explain how hurt my head was. It kept on thumping and thumping as if there was some kind of a drum inside my head. Right part of my head to be exact. As if it beats on its own. So what I did was I tried to bang it against the wall. Ha! Ha! When something hurts inside I would recommend to try to hurt yourself outside. :D

But nothing happened. It just hurt.

My first vomit brought me to feel like it's snowing. My stomach crumbled and the rest of the vomits are history.

Those yukky thing.. I still get to share them because I feel I owe you some explanations. ^_^



After a thousand and one tests.. I was diagnosed of Vertigo. And that medicine for high blood people doesn't work anymore in my system. Either it would kill me in the process because it doesn't work at all or I would change my medicine. But my mother, who only know the cheap ones, would prefer to buy me those medicines that would kill me eventually. For all intents and pusposes-- she said it's for the advance process of dying.


I guess she's right.
It would do no good for me at all.. Trying.

She has been (even) muttering that the anti-Vertigo medicine costs too much!

I would love to die in sleep, if that would be quite easier to take.



But after two days of suffering, only the dizziness has gone. I still feel like throwing up any time of the day without sudden notice. I hell life can be, eh?

Here I am, under the super-sunny-summer season of April is under the sheets. Headaches, cold and that feel of throwing up makes my life exciting. :D

How exciting?! ^^

_________________________

Treasure, that is what you are

 Honey you're my golden star

You know you can make my wish come true

If you let me treasure you

If you let me treasure you

- Treasure, Bruno Mars

_______________________________________

"Forgetting him was like trying to know somebody.."

I just got to listen to Taylor Swift's Red. That song was a double thumb's up in my ears.
So I searched for its guitar chords..


Credit goes to the owner/s.
The chords/tab is not mine.
Just copied this from the web to share.
Thanks.

Here it is:

Red

Taylor Swift

Intro- F  Am  G

                    F                 Am

Lovin' him is like, drivin' a new Maserati

                G

Down a dead end street

F                           Am

Faster than the wind, passionate as sin

         G

Ended so suddenly

                    F

Loving him is like, tryin' to change your mind 

            Am                         G

Once you're already flying through the free fall

         F                  Am

Like the colors in autumn so bright

                 G          -stop

Just before they lose it all

               F                    C

Losing him was blue, like I'd never known

                G

Missing him was dark grey, all alone

                   F                       Am

Forgetting him was like trying to know somebody

          G

You never met

                   F

But loving him was red

          Am        G

Re ee ed, re ee ed, re ee ed

               F

Lovin' him was red

          Am        G

Re ee ed, re ee ed, re ee ed

                       F                      Am

Touching him was like, realizing all you ever wanted 

                   G

Was right there in front of you

                       F                       Am

Memorizing him was as, easy as knowin' all the words

                    G

To your old favorite song

                           F 

Fighting with him was like tryin' to solve a 

              Am                           G

Crossword and realizing there's no right answer

                        F                        Am

Regretting him was like wishing you never found out 

                       G

That love could be that strong 

               F                    C

Losing him was blue, like I'd never known

                G

Missing him was dark grey, all alone

                   F                       Am

Forgetting him was like trying to know somebody

          G

You never met

                   F

But loving him was red

          Am           G

Re ee ed, re ee ed, oh red, re ee ed

        F              Am

Burnin' red, re ee ed, re ee ed

G

Re ee ed, 

                         F               C

Remembering him comes in flashbacks and echos

                    Am             G

Tellin' myself it's time now gotta let go 

                   F

But moving on from him is impossible 

     C                       G     -stop

When I still see it all in my, head 

            F   Am  G

And burning red

       F      Am  G

Burning was reeeeed

                  F F F -mute            C C C -mute

Oh losing him was blue, like I'd never known

                G G G -mute          G G G 

Missing him was dark grey, all alone

                   F                       Am

Forgetting him was like tryin' to know somebody

          G

You never met

                     F

Cause loving him was red

Am          G

Yeah, yeah, red

           F   Am  G

Oh Burning reeeeeeeed

           F                  Am              G

And that's Why he's spinnin' 'round in my head

                              F   

Comes back to me, burnin' red 

  Am      G

Yeah, yeah

                   F -once           Am -once

His love was like, drivin' a new Maserati

               G -once

Down a dead end street.

________________________________

It wasn't.

The sun didn't rose today. Well, I don't think that's the right words to use, but really, the sun didn't rose today.

Only there's light. But no sun at all.

Gloomy?
Windy.


It was announced last night in 24 Oras News that the said Typhoon Domeng's already in the Philippine territory. For all I care.. We are in a summer season.

I could feel the June-July rush in my skin. I could smell that sour/blunt smell of concrete being washed by rain. But there's no rain. And there's no sun. Only windy.. Gloomy day.


I would like to remember this day..




No worries at all.

_______________________________

 IT TRULY HURTS



*****KUNG NABABASA MO ITONG POST NA ITO.. KASI GUSTO KO MABASA MO TALAGA ITO. KAHIT MAKI-CHISMIS KA NA LANG.. HAHA!

---

Bakit hindi ka man lang mag-abalang basahin mga message namin? Wala ka bang panahon? Sa totoo lang ayokong gawin ito pero talagang ubos na pasensya ko..

Para din naman malaman ng lahat diba?
Wala naman na akong hiya eh. Naubos na mula ng iwan mo kami, kailangan kong magpakapal mukha dito para lang mabuhay, at para malaman mo rin kasi parang hindi mo alam nangyayari samin.

Nakakahiya lang, kailangan ko pang umabot sa ganito. Kasi wala kang effort para sa mga anak mo.

Alam mo ba kung anong nangyayari samin ngayon?
May idea ka ba kung kumakain pa mga anak mo o kung natutulog pa ba sila sa isang bahay na may bubong? O kung nakakapasok pa ba sa school si Mike? O kung ALAM MO KUNG SAAN KAMI NAKATIRA? MINSAN BA NAPAISIP KA?

Kasi parang HINDI MO NAIISIP.. O PARANG DI MAN LANG SUMAGI SA ISIP MO?

Galit kaming lahat, ultimo si Mike may galit na din sa'yo. Gusto ko nga malaman kung anong pinag-gagawa mo dyan sa Dubai at para bang wala kang pamilyang naiwan dito..

Ay oo nga pala, kung tutuusin wala ka nga palang pamilya. Feel na feel mo kasi na para kang isang binata-- walang naiwang responsibilidad dito sa pinas.

San mo nga ba inilalagay mga kinikita mo dyan PAPA? sa tingin ko may karapatan din naman akong magtanong kung ano ng kalagayan mo dyan. At meron din naman ata kaming karapatan magtanong kung san napupunta kinikita mo dyan? Kasi kami kahit kailan HINDI NA NAGING MAAYOS.

Mula kasi ng umalis ka noon eh nakalimutan mo na kami ng tuluyan.

SANA MAN LANG NAG-EFFORT KANG MAIPAGPATAPOS KAHIT ISA MAN LANG SA AMIN.. Kaso wala eh.

Sana man lang kahit papaano may NATANGGAP akong PADALA mula SA'YO NOON KAHIT PISO. KASO WALA EH. KINAKAILANGAN PA NAMIN MAGMAKAAWA NA KAHIT MAN LANG BAGONG DAMIT, EH SANA MAY DALA KA PAG-UWI. Eh ano yon? Mga ukay-ukay doon? Hayup. Mula nung 15 years old ako ni isang panyo, wala ka man lang naibili kahit isa para sakin. KAHIT MAN LANG PARA KAY MIKE.

Parang utang na loob ko pa ng magpadala ka ng 2K dahil nagkasakit ako.

Ni PISO wala kang pinadala para sa pag-aaral ko.
Ni PISO wala kang pinadala para sa pagkain ko. PARA SA PAGKAIN NAMIN. O para sa upa.. O para man lang sa mga PANAHON NA KAILANGANG-KAILANGAN NAMIN.

Si Mike ba tinuring mong anak? Akala mo siguro HINDI tao ung bata eh. Lumalaki na ngayon si Mike pero ni tsinelas ng umuwi ka dito last year eh di mo naibili. Ni piso wala ka ngang naiabot. SA TOTOO LANG HINDI KA TALAGA NYA KILALA..

TANGINA.. NAISIP MO BA KUNG KAMUSTA NA KAMI?
NI PISO WALA KANG PINAPADALA.. UMALIS, DUMATING, UMALIS KANG MULI, NI SINGKO WALA.

WALA!

Akala mo ba may kinikita pa kami sa iniwan mong shop. Eh akala mo ba may shop pa? WALA NA. Wala naman kinikita ung iniwan mong shop..

NAG-IWAN KA PA NG MGA UTANG, AT ANG NAGBAYAD EH SI MAMA.. UTANG MO PARA MAKAALIS KA PERO NI PISO WALA KANG IPINADALA PARA PAMBAYAD.. PARA MAN LANG PAMBAYAD DUN, WALA PA.

Mahirap nga magpalaki ng magulang.
Kaming mga anak mo, eto, nagsasapalaran kahit mahirap.
Ginagawa ko ito para man lang malaman NILA.. ng hindi naman kami DEHADO diba?
Kaming mga anak mo ang kawawa.. Akala ng madla kami ang nagtaboy sayo pero IKAW ang tuluyang nagputol ng komunikasyon sa amin.

Minsan ba tumawag ka sakin noon?

LAST YEAR ka lang tumawag sa akin PA! Noong nakarating ka na dyan sa Dubai.
Sabi ka ng sabi na magpapadala ka.. ASAN NA?

Sa mga nakakabasa.. Mula po ng umalis ang tatay ko noong 2005 eh ni singko wala po syang ipinadala para sa akin at kay Mike.
2005-2007: wala..
2008-2011: wala..
2011-2013: wala..

At bakit ako nagbubutaktak dito?

Bakit Papa, meron ka bang ginawa para man lang mapag-aral ako?
Meron ka bang ginawa para di kami mawalan ng bahay at shop?
Meron ka bang ginawa ng paulit-ulit kaming nagme-message sayo AT TUMATAWAG.

NAGSASAYANG AKO, KAMI NG LOAD PARA LANG MAKONTAK KA PERO NI HA, NI HO.. WALA. PINAPATAYAN MO KAMI NG TAWAG.

KAYA WALA KANG MAGAGAWA KUNG GAGAWIN KO ITO.

ITO ANG PARAAN KO PARA MAN LANG MAKAPAGPAHAYAG NG GUSTO KONG SABIHIN.. DAPAT NGA NOON PA. LATE NA NGA KUNG TUTUUSIN..

At ano? Balita ko happy-go-lucky ka dyan sa Dubai.. Magkano ba yong pinambili mo ng barong mo dyan? Na dito mo daw pinabili sa pinas? Astig ka talaga.. Pero dito si Mama kayod kalabaw para sa lahat ng babayarin. Ikaw dyan? Kamusta naman ha?

GUSTO KA NGA NAMIN IPA-DEPORT..

-----

Tapos darating ka.. Pucha.. Darating ka at di mo malunok ang kalagayan namin dito? Eh tangina, tatay ka namin, may ginawa ka ba ng halos pambili ng bigas eh isusugal pa namin para lang pantawag sa'yo baka sakaling makapagpadala ka agad kasi bukas wala na kaming matitirahan. Well in fact, at the first place, kasalanan mo din naman kasi HINDI KA NAGPUNDAR NG MATITIRAHAN NG PAMILYA MO. SANA MAN LANG KAHIT TIRAHA MERON, KAHIT DI MO NA KAMI PINAG-ARAL..

Pero wala eh. LAHAT WALA.

AKO? 23 na ako, kung tutuusin nga WALA na akong karapatan pang humingi ng kahit ano kasi matanda na daw ako. Eh tangina, NOONG KAILANGAN KO NG PANG-TUITION, NG PAMPAGAMOT, NG MAKAKAIN, KAHIT MAN LANG BIRTHDAY NAMIN HINDI SASAGI SA ISIP MO..

NOONG KAILANGAN KITA, NOONG DI PA AKO NAKAKAPAGTRABAHO.. PULUBI KAMI. OO PULUBI, KASI KAHIT ANO, WALA.

AT NGAYON, KAHIT ANONG GAWIN KO HINDI AKO MAKAHANAP NG TRABAHO KASI WALA NAMAN AKONG NATAPOS. AT NG SABIHIN KONG MAG-AARAL AKO.. ANONG SABI MO? "BAKA GUSTO MO LANG MAG-ARAL?" NA KESYO DAPAT MAG-ABROAD AKO.. EH PUCHA, NI PANG-PASSPORT NGA WALA EH, KULANG PA. HALOS AKO NA NAGPAPAKAIN SA MGA MALILIIT KAHIT WALA NAMAN AKO, KASI DI NAMAN AKO MAKAKAHANAP NG TRABAHO, KASI DI NAMAN AKO NAGTAPOS.. KASI HINDI, KAHIT NA KELAN, PINURSIGE NG TATAY KO NA MAKAPAG-ARAL AKO..

TAPOS NG DUMATING KA DITO, ANO? NGISI LANG? GANON LANG? DI MO MA-TAKE KALAGAYAN NAMIN KAYA NGISI NA LANG. PARANG ANG SAYA SAYA MO PA NA NAGKAGANUN KAMI.. EH ALAM MO BA PAPA.. NEVER. NEVER KAMING NAGKULANG SA'YO. NAG-REACH OUT KAMI, SI ELOIDA, SI BIBOY.. PERO MINSAN BA NAISIP MO KAMI? SI MIKE.. ANG LAKI NG UTANG SA SCHOOL PERO NI PISO.. WALA.

TAPOS ANONG DALA MO? CHOCOLATE NA PARANG BARYA LANG NG PERA MO.. AT WALA KA PA NGANG IPON..

OO.. TANGGAPIN MO MGA MURA KO. NATUTUNAN KO YAN SA MGA HAYUP NATING KAPITBAHAY DITO. LAHAT NG SAKRIPISYO NAMIN NI MAMA MAPANGALAGAAN LANG ANG SHOP GINAWA NAMIN. ALIPIN AKO, TAGA BILI, TAGA BUHAT NG MGA SOFA, PERO WALA AKONG KINIKITA SA DATING SHOP. AKIN LAHAT.. NAGING TATAY AT NANAY AKO SA MGA KAPATID KO.. PATI SARILI KO NAKALIMUTAN KO NA. KINAKAILANGAN KONG MAGING LALAKE DITO KASI WALANG IBANG PWEDENG MAGING LALAKE NA MAGTATANGGOL SA LAHAT NG ORAS KAY MAMA AT KAY MIKE.

AT NGAYON, NA GUSTO KONG MAG-ARAL, ANO? MAY MAITUTULONG KA BA? SYEMPRE WALA..

PERO ITO LANG ANG MASASABI KO.. WAG KANG MAGTAKA KUNG ISANG ARAW HINDI KA NA NAMIN KILALA..

KASI NABUBUHAY KAMI NG WALA KA, WALANG TULONG MO O KAHIT NA ANONG GALING SAYO. KAYA WAG KANG UMASA NA PAGDUMATING UNG PANAHON NA HANAPIN MO "ULIT" KAMI KASI WALA KANG MAUWIAN.. EH MAY MAGHIHINTAY PA SAYO AT TATANGGAP.. KASI WALA NA. DUN KAMI SIGURADO.

PAPA, WAG KANG MAHIHIYA KUNG GAGAWIN KO ITO KASI PUNONG-PUNO NA AKO. ANG TAGAL NG ITINAHIMIK NAMIN.. PERO AKO NA ANG MAUUNA PARA GAWIN ITO. TAHIMIK LANG KAMI.. KAHIT NA GANTO KALAGAYAN NAMIN. NABUBUHAY KAMI NA KATUWANG LANG MGA SARILI NAMIN..

AT WAG KANG MAG-ALALA.. KASI HINDING HINDI KITA HIHINGAN NI PISO KAPAG NAG-ARAL AKO O SA KAHIT NA ANO PA MAN NA KAKAILANGANIN NAMIN. KASI HINDI NA MAGBABAGO PA AT HINDI MO NA MABABAGO PA MGA DAMAGE NA NAGAWA AT NANGYARI SAMIN DITO..

MANANATILI KAMING MASAYA AT KUNTENTO ANO MAN ANG DUMATING.
HINDI KA NA NAMIN KAKAILANGANIN.

*******

Hindi ako nahihiyang sabihin ito dito para hindi naman na kami nade-dehado.

Edizer Brion

______________________________

Eun Hyuk..

Happy Birthday!

________________________________

ALL FOOL'S DAY. ^^

(OL PULS DEY)

HA!HA! HA!

_______________________